Note to Self

I’ve read The Memorandum twice now, and I continue cracking up at the vicious circle Ballas creates for anyone seeking a translation of documents written in Ptydepe. Sadly, my experience with purchasing equipment in the military was more or less the same - each purchase had to be justified in writing, presented to three different individuals for approval, and then sent through a separate accounting entity with independent and absolute veto power.

When I was in the Marines I once tried to replace some mission-essential computer systems that were alarmingly out of date. I spent three weeks researching suppliers, drafting a purchase proposal, and obtaining the approval of my battalion’s Communications Officer (my boss), my Company Commander, my battalion’s Supply Officer, and even my Battalion Commander.

Each computer was about $6000, and four needed to be replaced. I compromised at three in order to get the purchase the green light, which meant that I’d have to fix the fourth computer on my own time and save it as a back-up. I was able to get the go-ahead to buy the equipment though, and I placed the order with the government contractor through our battalion’s Supply office.

Three weeks later I was informed that an independent base auditor had vetoed the purchase, and that we wouldn’t be allowed to replace the equipment at all. Instead, I was told I had to do my best with what I had, which meant cobble together two sort-of-working machines out of the four dying pieces of junk we had.

I felt very much like Gross - exasperated, angry, and backed into a corner all at once. I complained to every single officer who had approved the purchase, even filed a formal written appeal, but the veto stood.

It’s taken me almost two years to laugh about it, but I finally can. I feel a little more whole than I have in a long time.